Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
