I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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