She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
