btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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