Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
