Michael Bay diarrhea
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
