is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize
