Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
