my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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