Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
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