is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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