two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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