: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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