You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
