it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
