marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
