did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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