she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
