Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
