My nipple is on Facebook.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
accomplished twins. life is a go
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
it's great music for shaving your balls
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
