She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
