We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
