Me too!
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
