Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
last night I used snow as a chaser
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Randomize
