Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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