he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
After tacos, we're chasing women.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
