I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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