I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Randomize
