I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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