I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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