we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
