Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
