are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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