We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
