I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
as a side note pls kill me
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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