Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
