Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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