speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
