I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
