a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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