I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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