it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
