Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
