i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Randomize
