I'm lost and stupid without you.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize
