I'm gonna have a badass scar
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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