I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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