So drunk, too bad you don't want this
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
