I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
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