It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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